Getting children to eat through pressure doesn’t work.

That was one of the messages nutritionist Pam Estes offered to a an audience of parents, educators and caregivers Monday night in a free talk at St. Peter’s Hospital.

Estes spoke about setting up an environment supportive of a child being a competent eater throughout life, which happens by meeting four goals: the child likes to eat and likes to be at the table, knows how to behave at the table, is comfortable even with unfamiliar food and allows the sensation of hunger and fullness to guide eating.

“One phrase captures it all,” Estes said, attributing it to Ellyn Satter. “You need to establish and maintain a division of responsibility in feeding.”

This is accomplished through meal and snack planning provided at a table setting allowing children pick what they want from a variety of food options without forcing them to eat things they don’t like.

“One of the normal eating behaviors for a child is to like something one day and not another, so it’s better just to accept it,” Estes said.

When children are allowed to play a role in deciding what and how much they want to eat, they learn they are trusted by their parents.

Parent should accept and support the child’s growth, whatever that may be — low and slow, high and fast or somewhere in between, Estes said.

“As long as we do a good job with feeding them, the child will eat what they need when they need it,” she said.

The interactive two-hour workshop devoted much time to questions and answers.

One mom inquired about her 5-year-old daughter who won’t sit at the table — she wants to get up and down, spills juice or has to use the restroom — making mealtime a household struggle.

Estes’ advice was to ask the child to join the family for the meal without requiring her to eat. The busy little girl won’t go hungry, because, Estes said, a parent’s “ace in the hole” is a snack before bedtime.

Another man asked about the location of meals and if a family table is important, versus, for example, eating in front of the television.

“Sitting at the table with parents is critically important,” Estes answered. “First and foremost (television) is a distraction. They won’t focus on their food or their bodies, and they’ll do more and dare more (like trying new foods) when their parents are present.”

Michelle Campbell of Glasgow came to the workshop to bring information back to the 35 childcare providers she works with in northeast Montana. Campbell is a Child and Adult Care Food Program coordinator for Hi-Line home programs.

Campbell said many caregivers struggle with feeding — particularly with picky eaters.

Parents sometimes give children what’s easy, like chicken nuggets and French fries, she said, but licensed providers are required to provide nutritional food if they want to get reimbursed.

Elaine Cahill is a childcare provider in Helena and said she found the talk very informative and the videos particularly helpful.

“Mostly of it was reinforcing what we already do,” she said.

Estes said parents should not cater to picky eaters.

“Catering limits the opportunity for a child to try new things,” she said. “Children need to see food 10, 15, 20 times without pressure to eat them before they try them.”

What doesn’t work is the time-honored approach of having a child take just one bite of a food they have indicated they don’t like. Instead, Estes said, parents should wait and trust the child will learn to push themselves along.

“When the pleasure goes out of eating, the child isn’t learning from his own instinctual desire, but doing it just to please his parents,” she said. “The whole goal of feedings is to raise a child so when they leave home they have the ability to take care of food all by themselves.”

Estes is a registered dietician and behavioral feeding specialist who brought her message to the Queen City from Indiana.

She is part of the Ellyn Satter Institute, a national organization which provides resources for professionals and the public about eating and feeding.

The two-day workshop continues today, focusing on methods for teaching children effective eating habits.

“We are really talking about bringing pleasure back to eating and fun back to feeding,” Estes said.

Reporter Alana Listoe: 447-4081 or alana.listoe@helenair.com